Saturday, December 20, 2014

how to build a girl. caitlin moran. (247)


i thought i picked up caitlin moran's how to build a girl based on flavorpill recommendation but i couldn't find the article.  even though i can't remember where i saw it, i am glad that i decided to check it out.  and i mean the lena dunham blurb on the cover is totally unnecessary, helpful but this book is amazing it can sell itself. 

i hate to be so late to the game on moran but i knew nothing about her before i read this novel.  apparently, moran is a famous british journalist and wrote this feminist book called how to be a woman back in 2012 (i have since put in a request for this book).  i hate to admit this but i remember her book being on sale on amazon but judged a book by a cover, and didn't give it a thought.  it was her skunk hair.  i didn't take her seriously but i really wish i did!!

how to build a girl is loosely based on moran's life.  at least that is what the disclaimer at the beginning said.  she was a music journalist, had a large family, and grew up in wolverhampton.  but the lead character, johanna is not moran.

when we first meet johanna, you can't help but feel bad for the poor girl.  she was fat, friendless, awkward, and a chronic masturbator.  she masturbated a lot!  and with her older brother in the room and her younger brother in the bed next to her.  when i read that i was certain that is why lena dunham has so much love for moran as her blurb claimed.  seriously, what is with people masturbating with siblings in their bed, in high school, i felt bad if anyone else was in the house at the same time that i did it!

johanna's family was also poor, due to her father's dreams of being a rock star which resulted in him really just being an alcoholic.  he also did have an accident but still he just drank and lived off of his benefits.  however, when johanna spills the beans about her father being on benefits to a neighbor, which would
result in them losing them; she decided to get a job to help out.

her first attempts to time a job, a paper route and a starring in a production of "annie" are unsuccessful.  however, when johanna's luck changed when she  won a poetry contest (though her luck didn't change completely because she embarassed herself on tv.  however, it did help johanna realize that she wanted to be a writer and that writing would be the key to her helping her family and getting out of wolverhampton.

since johanna did not know anything about indie rock, she had to start completely from scratch.  she listened to a lot of music, but nothing that would be considered "cool".  her rock education started via the radio and the library, where she checked our CDs.  since she was starting from scratch, johanna needed a rock persona which results in her building a girl.  johanna created dolly wilde, named after oscar wilde's alcoholic lesbian niece.  i loved the nod to oscar wilde and dolly was totally the best choice for johanna, but i loved the name laurel canyon.  i have always wanted an amazing band-aid name, like "almost famous", and was always sad that penny lane was used because it is perfect. and laurel canyon is so good! i wish i thought of it.  oh, well.

so dolly wilde wore all black and a top hat like slash.  and after johanna sent in reviews to the magazine, "D&ME", she became a music journalist.  she also quite school to have more time to write.  one of her first assignments was attending a smashing pumpkins show, which her dad took her too cos she is so young.  initially, she tries to take notes, but in the end, realized that she just needed to enjoy the moment instead of being an observer.  dolly, even managed to get backstage to talk to the band!  

after the pumpkins, she was sent to ireland to interview john kite.  he was described as a jeff buckley type, but due to his fur coat and dandyish ways, i thought of him as oscar wilde. i also expected him to turn out gay.  however, dolly and kite had a wonderful time together, (they sounded like soulmates to me.) and she fell in love with him.  

oh and my favorite quote from them hanging out was this:

"you gonna norwegian wood it, love?", he said as i crawled off to sleep in the bath." 

so freakin' cute and clever!!!

however, after she sent in her interview, the calls stopped coming, because the piece was too fan-ish.  and with this realization dolly wilde went wild.

first it started with booze, she started drinking to created this wild child persona. then, she started writing these cruel reviews with created this bitch persona.  and last, she started having sex which resulted in this sex adventurerer persona.  and though it was hilarious and fun to read all of this, it was not good for dolly.  she started sleeping with the wrong men and making a compete mess of her life.  (i could totally relate.) 

in the end, after throwing herself at john kite, she realized she needed to
stop being dolly wilde and start being johanna again.

as a result, chapter 24 is wonderful advice for any girl, particularly teenage girls, but any female trying to find herself. we all make mistakes but as moran advises via johanna:

you'll find the tiny, right piece of grit you can pearl around, until nature kicks in, and your shell will just quietly fill with magic? even while you're busy doing other things.  what your nurture began, nature will take over, and start completing, until you stop having to think about who you'll be entirely--as you're too busy doing, now.

what a great little pearl of wisdom!

in the end johanna, begins her journey towards her new self.  she decided to move to london and continue her writing but as a fan and as herself!

this book was great and i highly recommend it.  johanna is hilarious and i would totally be her friend if she was a real person.  

just look at this quote:

when bill murray says shit like this, people completely lost it.  i wish used bill murray.  i hope everything i've read about evolution is wrong, and i eventually evolve into him.

bloody brilliant!  this book is filled with gems like this.

if you are a girl, women, riot grrl and lived or loved the nineties you need to read this book.  so good and i look forward to reading moran's other works.



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