driftwood. elizabeth dutton. (254)

i picked up driftwood because emma robert's posted it on our instagram.  and i kind of wish i scrolled through by the picture because i did not enjoy the book.

the premise sounded cool, the daughter of a rock star goes on a road trip planned out for her by her dad upon his death.  i figured it would be as moving as cameron crowe's elizabethtown.  it was not.  it was like a bad lifetime movie.

to start, clem, the daughter was seriously #heiressproblems.  it's hard to be sympathetic to a character when money ain't a problem to them.  i am not saying that money solves everything, but i don't understand this mentality that money makes one immune to real issues.  i mean her biggest issue was that she didn't get excited about life.  really? she was unemployed but lived a life of luxury.  and yes she was lost like all twentysomethings are but she had the means to pursue her dreams because her family could financially support what she wanted to pursue.  her dad wasn't going to help her start a cafe but the ambition fizzled out of her. i couldn't empathize with her, i was too annoyed by her #firstworldproblems.

just like clem, the book lacked depth.  the road trip was a bit of a farce.  i felt like clem didn't gain any insight on her father based from the actual locations but more from the letters, so she probably should have just read them at home.  a random love interest was thrown in to help put the "lessons" she was learning into effect, but it all felt so staged.

but the worse was the ending.  it turned out her father wasn't who he said he was.  he actually killed a man and took on his identity, well name!  it was the most bizarre twist.  granted it was painted as a result of the abuse he dealt with as a child.  the abuse was revealed during the trip in a letter.  it was also foreshadowed by her love interest's story of beating up a guy because he had an abusive dad.  but whatever i still felt it was inexcusable. i mean he killed a man and took on his name and lived a normal life.  can we say psycho killer?!?! i can't believe clem didn't freak out, but actually discovered herself via this ending.  seriously, such a horrible book.

the only plus i can say is that one, it mentioned wasco which is near where i live! and two i learned that when nor cal and so cal meet on the 99, there is a pine tree and palm tree planted to represent the two regions

other than that, my advice to you, do not read this book.

blankets. craig thompson. (253)

blankets has been on my to read list for a very long time.  however, when i saw it on time's 100 best young adult books, i decided to finally check it out.

i really wish that i had read this when it first came out in 2003.  i identified with craig and would have enjoyed reading this closer to when i went through a similar experience.  blanket is an semi-autobiographical graphic novel about thompson's experience growing up in a religious household and his first love.  what i identified with was craig's questioning of his faith and the church leaders insistence on following christian path.  my questioning of my religion, as i discussed before was due to the church views on homosexuality and how i thought it was unfair that families were separated unless they were sealed in the temple.  for craig it was contradiction in the bible and the realization that though the bible may be the word of god it had been filtered through men.  also reading his pastor advise him against going to art school due to the possibility of exposure to nude models and the risk of becoming a homosexual, reminded me of an conversation i had once with a girl i went to church with.  (i may have shared this before in another post, so i apologize for being redundant.  a girl i went to church camp asked me where i was going to school, and i told her ucla.  she then asked me what i was going to do.  i explained study history.  but she asked again, but you go to byu to get married, how are you going to get married.  i think i just smiled as a response.  though i will say that i am grateful for being raised mormon.  as child growing up, we did not fear god, but saw jesus as a loving savior, and were not made to be scared of hell as i saw with craig.

but college was an eye opening experience for me, like craig.  i wasn't born in a completely rural area like him, but being exposed to the big city of los angeles, allowed me to realize that there was more out in the world.

the story of his first love was sweet and like should happen with all first loves, he grew as a person.  he was able to see the world for as it was and not for what he was told it was.  i think the greatest thing was that he reconnected with his brother after seeing how close raina was with her siblings.  it was nice to see them become friends in the end.  (i should also note know it was really difficult to read about his brother's molestation as a child.  craig should have done something, but easier said then done because he was a child himself, but still sickening to read.)

i also found it disheartening to read about raina's adoptive siblings.  i think it was wonderful that her parents decided to adopt two children with disabilities, however, their reasoning behind it seemed unsound.  they adopted the ben and laura as a thank you to god for blessing them with two children.  a beautiful gesture, but neither one were equipped to take care of them.  and in the end, resulted in their divorce and the responsibility becoming that of raina.  i might sound insensitive, but you should adopt to truly help a child not to prove a point about how blessed you are. 

but a wonderful coming of age story and beautiful illustrations.  i also loved that the library was a tool in helping craig discover the world and who he was.  definitely a top young adult book!

  

lucky us. amy bloom. (252)

i came across lucky us in a book riot post and decided to check it out.  it actually took along time to get to me via the library.  and once i got it i was a little skeptical about whether or not i would enjoy it, but it turned out to be a delight! 

lucky us is the story of two half sisters, iris and eva. their story was told via first account from eva, letter's from iris, and letters from a gus, a man that enters later in the story.  it is also told in third person at time.  which i enjoyed because it allowed for one to guess at how things would unfold.  

the story opens with eva's mother abandoning her.  at first, things were awkward, but iris and eva grew close.  iris was a pageant queen and won money from contests, but when they discover their father was stealing from here they head out to hollywood.  

their lives are series of ups and downs.  iris got a lucky break in the hollywood and her career was starting to take off, but then she due to her relationship with another woman is blacklisted because she is a lesbian.  however, at this point their father has hunted them down to take them back home.  instead, they move to new york, where thanks to a make-up artist, francisco, iris got a job as a governess and their father as a butler for a rich family.  

things are going well, but then iris fell in love with the cook, reenie.  iris then forced eva to hang out with the cook's husband, gus.  then in a bought of jealous, iris turned him in as a german spy.  he was deported to germany and his life took a handful of unfortunate events.  we learn of his journey via his letters.

to comfort reenie, iris and eva essentially kidnapped a kid, danny from an orphanage.  all is well.  reenie was happy as a mother.  however, in the end, a fire occurred which killed reenie and injured iris.  iris was sent to london to have her burns treated.

eva was the left to care for danny.  since she never finished school, she was unable to get a job.  however, she took up tarot and did that for a living.  then her father got sick and so that added to her responsibilities.  she and danny both felt abandoned by eva but they persevere.  then her father died and times get really tough for her, but she manages.  franscisco, after an accident, in which eva saved his life, moved in with her and danny, and life was well.  eva decided to forge documents so she could go to medical school.

in the end, gus showed up and eva, and he and eva realized they loved each other.  eva also decided to make peace with her sister and asked her to return home.  in the end, though makeshift, they are one big happy family, eva, iris, danny, francisco, and gus.  they were very lucky to have found each other, and they live what i am assuming to be happily ever after.

as i mentioned before a delightful read.  a lot of turns and twists, but in the end, they all find happiness together.  

how to be a woman. caitlin moran. (251)

after reading moran's how to build a girl, i had to read how to be a woman.  and can i just say, i absolutely loved it and her.  if you are a woman, its a must read!

so this work is categorized as a memoir but i feel like it's more than that.  each chapter starts off with an event from moran's life but the lesson learned can be applied to all of us.

there is so much for me to write about, maybe i will go through chapter by chapter.  well maybe just favorite chapters.

"i become furry" in this chapter, moran discussed when her pubic hair began to grow and how she would shave it because she was scared of growing up and of course it.  this segues into a discussion on how we women work so hard to be hairless.  she shares how so much planning occurs when women go to a party via a conversation with a friend, which made me laugh cos it is so true.  her friend uncertain if she is going to sleep with this guy after a party, doesn't know if and when she should get waxed.  seriously it's such a bitch to have to deal with pubic hair.  you know my hurt hand?  it's from me trying to wax my upper life by myself before meeting up with a boy i thought i was in love with.  i mean i have given up on daily maintenance for my bush that only gets spruced up when i think someone is going to see it.  (if i was in a committed relationship, it would only get spruced up on special occasions, hence why i might still be single.) but i feel like i should have pubic hair, i'm an adult woman not a prepubescent child.  i refuse to be completely hairless down there, i mean i do clean it up when it needs to be but for the most part i let it be.  also nipple hair, i used to be so embarrassed by mine, but then now i just shave it when i need to.  i am a person, we have hair.  i mean the one on top of my head is quite lovely.  i think that should be the main focus.  and just like moran shared at the end, when she lost her virginity, the man did not care what the state of her pubic hair was.  its like my friend peter would always tells us in college, guys don't care if your underwear matches your bra, its just going to end up coming off anyway.

"i don't know what to call my breast".  this of course discussed finally getting breast and how they are referred to as.  this lead into a discussion on what to call your vagina.  i for one use vagina.  as a child growing up, our family didn't give it a nickname it was just our private part.  but what caused my decision to use vagina as the term to refer to my vagina was that one time at my work, a little girl told one of my tutor's that her vagina hurt. the tutor was so surprised by her use of vagina, but i mean the girl was right that was what she had.  we told her mom, it turns out she had been having some urinary issues and the mom also explained that she didn't want her daughter to use some silly term for her vagina so had her call it that.  i decided to do the same.

"i am a feminist".  so i have been on a bit of feminist kick since last year, after reading bad feminist, i have always seen myself as a feminist, but i feel like i am truly embracing it and this book reminded me why we need to reclaim this title.  as i shared on my instagram page:

love her for this!! but seriously this book isn't some feminist agenda, well it kinda is, but it's really just some good ol' girl talk about women issues.  though i will say i didn't always agree with what moran wrote, but then again, i don't have to, part of this new feminism is allowing acceptance of all ideas as long as progress is being made for women.  but if you are a woman and you want to be treated as an equal, then guess what, you are a feminist!

"i am in love", caitlin shared her horrible boyfriend that she thought she could change and from which she took abuse because she thought it was love.  we all have had this type of situation.  i blame romantic comedies for making us think we can change men that really aren't good for us.

"i go lap-dancing".  i felt guilty when i read it, because i have always been a bit of a "cool" girl, a guy's i mean strip clubs are gross, its a place men go to have women dance for them.  

"i get into fashion" fashion is expensive and i like moran don't spend a lot on handbags.  she did once and it was stolen.  though i am glad she wrote about how horrible heels are.  i really wish i could walk in them.  i recently discovered that my arch doesn't rest completely on the arc of the shoe so this might be why i can't wear heels. or maybe i am flat foot, i don't know.  i need to go see someone to verify this.

"abortion" what i admired about this piece was that moran was completely honest about having an abortion.  she didn't have one because she was too young, or unwed, or even sick, but because she knew she could not handle having another child.  that sounds horrible and insensitive but its honest.  she discussed how there is a notion of "good aids" ie someone getting it via blood transfusion and "bad aids" someone that gets its via drug needles.  the same kind be said for abortion.  moran got what some would consider a "bad abortion."  it appears selfish, but not all women are mothers, trust me i have worked with kids my whole life and some people are truly unfit to be mothers.  why bring a child into the world if you can not care for it like a mother should?  i know it sounds insensitive because life is life, a baby didn't choose to be born, but at the same time there is so much suffering in the world, why add to it.  at the end of the day, it's the pregnant woman's choice, she is the only one that can make the right decision for herself.  it might not be something that everyone agrees with, but then again are only truly responsible for ourselves.  

moran discussed a handful of other topics as well, pornography, childbirth (her first birth really grossed me out, i couldn't read it), bras, role models, and plastic surgery.  oh and growing up in the nineties, she writes alot about the riot grrl movement, which i need to revisit.  my roommate samira introduced me to bikini kill and bratmobile, so i have a taste but i need to get some more!

i just realized that this blog is about how my life relates to what she wrote about versus analysis of what she wrote.  but you need to read it and enjoy it yourself!  and all in all though it does explain how to be a woman, in the end, we learn that moran just wants to be a human, just one of the "guys" (which i think discredits her notions of feminism, because it still holds up equality on male terms.  but hey you can't win them all.  and regardless, this was funny book to read, so i forgive her!

books i read in 2014.

first things, first.  i am sorry that this post is happening on the 8th, but hey, it's happening.

this year i challenged myself on goodreads to read 80 books.  i am happy to announce that i read 90! 113%.  i feel like i have to admit that a handful of kid novels may have helped my number, but hey they still take time to read and have very valuable lessons, so don't get too judgy.

i also challenged myself to read more women in 2014! i found out about #readwomen2014 from flavorpill, author and artist, johanna walsh started the project and made these awesome bookmarks with female authors. (which i need to buy even though 2014 is over).  i am happy to announce that i read 58 books written by women!

2014 was also the year of the short story for me.  i never thought of myself as one that enjoys a collection of short stories, but i totally am.  in fact, some of the best books i read this year were in fact a collection of short stories.

so here are my favorite books of 2014:

novels:
"americanah" chimamanda ngozi adichie
"crazy rich asians" kevin kwan
"how to build a girl" caitlin moran
"a constellation of viral phenomena" anthony marra
 "this is where i leave you" jonathan tropper

short stories:
"the unamericans" molly antopol
"self-help" lorrie moore
 "bad behavior" mary gaitskill

memoir:
"i know why the caged bird sings" maya angelo
"fresh off the boat" eddie huang
"not that kind of girl" lena dunham

young adult/children's novel:
"holes" louis sachar
"like no other" una lamarche

collection of essays:
"bad feminist" roxane gay

and a special shout out to a work that surprised me with how much i enjoyed,  i seriously had no idea i would love it as much as i did:  

"we have always lived in the castle" shirley jackson

here is the list of all 90 books!

books of 2014

1.  "fraud" david rakoff

2.  "bad behavior" mary gaitskill

3.  "the little prince" antoine de saint-exupéry

4.  "americanah" chimamanda ngozi adichie 

5.  "& sons" david gilbert

6.  "self-help" lorrie moore

7.  "eleanor & park" rainbow rowell

8. "flora and ulysses" kate dicamillo

9.  "one more thing" b.j. novak

10.  "little failure" gary shteynart

11.  "the watsons go to birmingham-1963" christopher paul curtis

12.  "super sad true love story" gary shteynart 

13.  "kristy's great idea" ann m. martin

14.  "kristy's great idea:  a graphic novel" ann m. martin and tania telgemeir

15.  "esperanza rising" pam muñoz ryan

16.  "native speaker" chang rae lee

17.  "turn around bright eyes:  the rituals of love & karaoke" rob sheffield

18.  "holes" louis sachar

19.  "the interestings" meg wolitzer

20.  "lupita mañana" patricia beatty

21.  "just before dawn" joshua hernandez

22.  "the westing game" ellen raskin

23.  "foxfire:  confessions of a girl gang" joyce carol oates

24.  "how a person should be?" sheila heti

25.  "birds of america" lorrie moore

26.  "the cricket in times square" george sheldon

27.  "when you reach me" rebecca stead

28.  "bark:  stories" lorrie moore

29:  "taipei" tao lin

30.  "we have always lived in the castle" shirley jackson

31.  "a little princess" frances hodgson burnett

32.  "the fun parts" sam lipsyte

33.   "a wrinkle in time: graphic novel" madeline l'engles and hope larson

34.  "fresh off the boat" eddie huang 

35.  "island of the blue dolphins" scott o'neill

36. "the unamericans" molly antopol 

37. "the stranger" albert camus

38.  "innocent eréndira and other stories" gabriel garcía márquez

39.  "tuck everlasting" natalie babbit

40.  "i know why the caged bird sings" maya angelo

41.  "blubber" judy blume

42.  "on such a full sea" chang-rae lee

43.  "crazy rich asians" kevin kwan

44.  "here's to you, rachel robinson" judy blume

45.  "a heartbreaking work of staggering genius" dave eggers

46.  "the other language" francesca marciano

47.  "relish" lucy knisley

48.  "a story lately told" anjelica huston

49.  "the fault in our stars" john green

50.  "the group" mary mcarthy

51.  "boy, snow, bird" helen oyeyemi 

52.  "everything leads to you" nina lacour

53.  "the lottery and other stories" shirley jackson

54.  "heartburn" nora ephron

55.  "the sleepwalker's guide to dancing" mira jacobs 

56.  "astonish me" maggie shipstead

57.  "the book of unknown americans" cristina henriquez

58.  "friendship" emily gould

59.  "like no other" una lamarche

60.  "this is how i'd love you" hazel woods

61.  "wallflower at the orgy" nora ephron

62.  "confetti girl" diana lopez

63.  "the calder game" blue balliett

64.  "this one summer" jillian tamaki and mariko tamaki

65.  "dandelion wine" ray bradbury

66.  "goodnight june" sarah jio 

67.  "the heart says whatever" emily gould 

68.  "the vacationers" emma straub

69.  "the awakening" kate chopin

70. "the absolutely true diary of a part-time indian" sherman alexie

71.  "bad feminist" roxane gay

72.  "2 a.m. at the cat's pajamas" marie-helene bertino

73.  "this is where i leave you" jonathan tropper

74.  "adam" ariel schrag

75.  "love me back" merritt tierce

76.  "not that kind of girl" lena dunham

77.  "james and the giant peach" roald dahl

78.  "a wild sheep chase" haruki murakami 

79.  "i am malala" malala yousafzai with christina lamb

80.  "the bell jar" slyvia plath

81.  "belzhar" meg wolitzer

82.  "ugly girls" lindsay hunter 

83.  "the goldfinch" donna tartt

84.  "a constellation of viral phenomena" anthony marra

85.  "we were liars" e. lockhart

86. "adverbs" daniel handler

87.  "how to build a girl" caitlin moran

88.  "the virgin suicides" jeffrey eugenides 

89.  "mr. fox" helen oyeyemi

90.  "can we talk about something more pleasant?" roz chast 

weetzie bat. francesca lia block.

so i was like 99.9% percent sure that i saw francesca lia block's weetzie bat on flavorpill, but i can not find a post.  i have found this amazing a "weird girl's reading list:  10 best outsider books for teenagers" that i will now add to my many list of books i need to read.  however, i know it wasn't this post that i learned of weetzie bat from because the cover is not the same.  though maybe the cover isn't why i got it? i just recognized the name.  anyway, who cares all that matter is that i have it.  and that i found it at the goodwill in delano! yes, in delano, and for like .79 i think.  talk about a deal!

so weetzie bat was supposed to be my final read of 2014.  it's only 113 pages and the book is a mini one so it's probably more like 50.  i started it on new years eve while waiting for my friend danny to finish his shopping at the amoeba in sf, however, i did not finish it before midnight struck.  (there was a lot of prep and prepartying on my nye). so instead of being my last book of 2014, it ended up being my first book of 2015 (i finished reading it while waiting for brunch on new years day!)

and can i just say that i love weetzie bat it's like this wild little adventures that takes place in the city that i love best, los angeles!  i mean on the first page, graumann's, the farmer's market and okie-dog are name-checked.  i texted my friend cody, who dragged me to okie-dog, a handful of nights, when i read that.  and it turns out his ex-stepmom had him reaad weetzie bat in high school!  (also i learned about ponyland which used to be an amusement park where the beverly center is now!)

so weetzie bat was a young high school girl that lives in shangri l.a., she had a blonde pixie haircut and dressed up in vintage dresses with taffeta or fringe, feather headdresses and moccasins (all the pre-coachella phenomenon.)  she befriended the hottest guy at school, dirk.  they spent a bunch of time hanging out, there was the promise of love in the air, and then it is discovered at the end of the chapter that dirk is gay!  the best ones are always gay! oh and i should clarify, no love in the hetero sense of boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, there is plenty of love between dirk and weetzie!

from dirk's grandmother, weetzie received a magic lamp.  a genie granted her three wishes and her life began to unfold.  i won't go into a rehashing of the plot, i mean it's 100 pages, you should check it out and i promise it won't take more than a day to finish.

i will say that i loved the story of dirk and duck, at the end of the novel. duck unable to cope with death of a friend to aids ran away to sf.  dirk just following instinct found him because duck was in his blood.  so sweet and what a wonderful point to make esp since blood became so scary due to aids.  

there is so much that happened in this novel and it was all weird and wonderful.  oh i just remember about how weetzie, dirk, and duck decided to have a child together!  loved that too.  it's a great little book and you should definitely pick it up or you can borrow mine.  hopefully i can make it through the rest of the series in 2015.  it was a great kick off book for the new year!