can't we talk about something more pleasant?: a memoir. roz chast. (250)

i had seen roz chast's memoir, can we talk about something more pleasant? on a handful of must read list.  however, i didn't start paying attention until i saw it included on best of 2014 lists and since i realized i hadn't read many of the books listed on the best of 2014 lists (though i have read books that came out in 2014), i decided to check it out.

prior to this memoir, i was not familiar with chast work.  she is a cartoonist for the new yorker.  i also was not familiar with the premise for the book.  based on the title and the cover, i thought it was going to be a fun stories of how parents get senile as they grow older and the odd conversations we have with them.  however, it is actually about her dealing with her parents aging and their deaths.  whenever chast tried to have a conversation about death, "can we talk about something more pleasant?" would be her parents' response.  i have to admit that i was a little bit worried about reading this because it has been a year since my grandmother death.  i was worried about it bringing up painful memories or that i might just randomly burst into tears.  it didn't.  though it reminded me how grateful i was to be with my grandma in her final years of life.  i always claimed that it was good for me to be back home for her to keep an eye on me but in reality, it was better to have her taking care of me.

being a graphic memoir, i actually finished the book in a day, probably closer to an afternoon.  it was an enjoyable read though it did remind me that i have a rough time ahead of me as my mom starts to grow older.  in fact, my aunt tracey and my uncle bob too.  but i don't want to think about that now.

the memoir is completely honest.  it covers all of the anxiety and stress that comes with dealing with aging parents.  and chast is a little neurotic and i was often shocked by how she reacted to some events.  for example, when chast's mother had her fall and went to the er, chast did not go to the hospital until a couple of hours after she got the phone call.  i understand that each person deals with emergencies in their own way, but i don't know how she didn't immediately rush to the hospital.  another time i was shocked was when her mother was released and instead of spending the night with her parents, she went back home.  again some people are different.  and i hate to be judgy, because it is tough and i have no idea what i would do if i was in that situation, i mean she is an only child and when i go through this i will have my siblings as support.  i hate to be so mean, but it was still shocking to read. 

and i know that its easier to said then done, but i can honestly say that i have done.  i'm not saying that i am better than chast and i hate to seem so judgy. but i am extremely squeamish when it comes to hospitals, like i could never sit through the emergency scenes in "ER" or the surgery scenes of "nip/tuck", however, i was always fine with staying overnight in the hospital room with my grandma.  in fact, my sister and i stayed with her in icu, one of the nights we were warned could be one of her last (thankfully we had her for a couple more weeks).  

and please don't take the examples as what time person chast.  she was actually very dedicated to making sure her parents were taken care of and comforted.  those were just two incidents that stuck out to me as i read.  there is alot more beauty to this book.  there is of course some humor, and i plan on reading more of her works.  it s a beautiful work in which she pays tribute to her parents and gives a very honest view of how tough it is to deal with death.

the unamericans. molly antopol. (198)

i first heard of the unamericans from my friend, lisa.  molly antopol is her friend's daughter, and lisa attended a book party for it.  then, i saw it listed on flavorrpill, so i decided to check it out.

as i mentioned before, 2014 has become the year of the short story for me and i can honestly say this is the best collection of short stories, i have read this year.  yes, i dare say, even better than lorrie moore, well bark, on par with self-help.  in fact, as i read, i had the same feelings of awe and love as i did when i read jhumpa lahiri's interpreter of maladies.  i, became invested in every single story, and each story felt complete.  i read somewhere that each story felt like a novel and that is an excellent description of the unamericans (sorry i feel bad for plagiarizing someone, but i honestly don't know where i read that, but i am letting you know it was not my original thought.)  but this collection was truly great, it will definitely be in the top 5 (it's currently in the top 3) greatest books i have read this year.

surprisingly i enjoyed every story in this collections.  usually, there is one that is awkward and you wonder why it was included, or one that ended too abruptly, or took an odd turned that ruined the story, but this was not the case.  every story was extremely well-written, as i mentioned before, i became invested in every character and their stories.

though there was not a bad story, i will admit that the opening to "retrospective", the final story, worried me.  i thought i was going to become bored, but luckily eva's daughter played a small role.  by the end, with the mention of eva's smile in her paintings, i knew this tale had a tragic ending.    

but again every story was enjoyable in their own way and i as i looked through to find my favorites, i want to list them all.  but i will narrow it down.  highlights for me were "my grandmother tells me this story", "the quietest man", and "the unknown soldier".

"my grandmother tells me this story" is exactly that a story told by a grandmother to a granddaughter that is meddling in things she is too young to be worried about.  the grandmother shared about how she escaped from a uniform factory in nazi-occupied poland and met a young boy who would become the young girl's grandfather.  the grandfather was the leader of a gang of boys, yiddish underground, and though they derail trains and steal, he has a moral compass and only took what was needed.  i do not want to give too much away, but in an attempt to prove herself, the grandmother does something that she regrets and that will haunt her forever.  it is a sad, tale but the one of the boundaries that humans were pushed to during the holocaust.

"the quietest man" is the story of a young playwright and her father.  the father was nervous because his daughter wrote a play about their family and since he was absent during her childhood, he was worried that it will reveal him as a deadbeat dad.  he did not want to be ridicule though he knew that it would be a true portrayal.  however, in the end it was revealed that the daughter's play is actually in tribute to him.  he was part of an anti-government movement in prague and he and her mother along with two others published a journal.  when he was called in for questioning, he did not reveal anyone's name thus earning the nickname "the quietest man."  his daughter hoping to make herself a part of this important event, asked him if she was there during the meetings of those in charge of the journal.  sadly, he lies to her, which broke my heart and just demonstrated what a horrible father he was.  ironically he should have just kept quiet.

"the unknown soldier" is the story of an actor that was blacklisted and served time during the mccarthy era.  he is fresh out of prison and wanting to reconnect with his son.  i won't go into too much detail (i feel like i did on that last one and i really want people to read this collection.)

i can't stress enough that this is the best collection of short stories i read this year.  antopol was national book foundation's 5 under 35 honoree.  she is very deserving of this title and i look forward to seeing more from her.

fresh off the boat. eddie huang. (196)

i remember seeing fresh off the boat at barnes and noble when it first came out, but didn't considered reading it.  with that cover it seemed like something i should look into but i didn't give it much thought after that initial sighting.  

i then saw a trailer for the new abc series based on it.  here, watch it on youtube.

after seeing his mom's hair struggles,  i decided to check it out.

if you thought that trailer was hilarious, you have no idea what you are in with this book.  fresh off the boat is beyond amazing and definitely in my top 3 books i have read this year.  if i hadn't read americanah this year fresh off the boat would probably be number 1.  eddie huang is also my new celebrity chef obsession.  i could kick myself for not picking this book up when i first saw it.  if i had, i would have gone to baohaus on my last nyc trip, boo to me!

i feel like a loser and am not as hip as i think i am because i hadn't heard of eddie huang or baohaus prior to my reading of this book.  i have no idea how he was not on my radar.  he also has a shown on vice, fresh off the boat, (which the book and now abc series evolved from) which are his random, food-related adventures around cities.  eddie is like a younger, chinese, hip hop version of bourdain.  my facebook friend, che, told my friend danny about the vice show.  i looked it up and of course watched the episode with roy choi.  it was hilarious yet deep, i will definitely play catch up on that series.

back to the memoir.  to start fresh off the boat made me hungry.  the memoir opened with a story about soup dumplings and eddie's ability at a young age to recognize that the ones he and his family had were bad because of the cheap soy sauce the restaurants used.  and of course, all i could think about was how i wanted soup dumplings (but some legit ones, i need to have my friend joann take me!!)  the memoir covered chinese/tawianese  food; what is mother makes and from a trip to taipei he took when he was in high school.  he discussed staples like minced pork, tomato and eggs, and beef noodle, all of which made me hungry!!!!  to the point where i googled minced pork to see where i could get some (sadly i was in delano and the closest was bakersfield, i had to settle for the chinese food place we have in town, thankfully i didn't have to go with panda express.)  but yeah minced pork is on my to-eat list, if anyone has a place to recommend, let me know. 

the book has some great food-related stories.  i especially enjoyed the story, eddie shared of returning to a dan-dan mian cart with his father.  his father was part of a gang in taiwan.  he learned from the owner that though his father was a hoodlum, he was very moral (this was exemplified when eddie was punished for stealing).  eddie discovered that his father looked out for this cart owner and the owner did the same for him, and one day saved his father's life.  

another story, i enjoyed was the story of eddie on the food network's ultimate recipe showdown.  i need to look for it online.  he sadly didn't win because reality tv is a joke, but he was the best, everyone off set agreed so.  i loved how he came up with his recipe while stoned. actually the meat he cooked reminded me of something my grandpa used to make called red meat. and i love the irony of guy fieri encouraging eddie to not give up cooking.

it was great to read about how baohaus got started up.  again i could have kicked myself for not being in the know.  i mean i should have been more serious about moving to nyc back in 09, i could have found one of his craiglist listing.  oh well.  but definitely happy he found success and i can't wait to try baohaus on my next trip.

the book wasn't all food.  with a title like fresh off the boat, culture and race were discussed.  i enjoyed learning about his family history, especially his parents backstory.  his mother being the loudmouth and always speaking her mind and his dad's gang background.  though it was cruel, i have to admit that i thought his parents' put-downs of eddie and his brothers were hilarious.  it's wrong to laugh and their comments were borderline verbal abuse but they were funny and honest.  i mean i admired his parents for keeping it real but the physical abuse did go to far.  i understand why people spank their kids but his dad did border abuse, and like eddie i am glad that the police went to their home to at least lessen the beatings they got.  though eddie was bad and deserved some of them (i know its horrible to say a kid deserved an ass-whooping but sometimes they do.)

what shocked me the most about this memoir was eddie's compete honesty about all the trouble he got into growing up.  he put everything out there.  i mean i was a nerdy kid and so i was shocked to read about all he did.  he reminded me of my friend larry, i always said if we knew each other in high school we wouldn't have been friends, i was too much of a goodie two shoes.  but like eddie, my friend larry, got his shit together and became a better adult as should happen in life.  your younger years are for fucking around.

i was also shocked by how intelligent eddie is.  the guy went to law school!  his intelligence is demonstrated best when he discussed the racism he encountered in life.  from the kids in elementary school making fun of his lunches, up until his boss at the newspaper making a comment about his face.  i especially enjoyed learning about his teachers and professors gave him the tools he needed to be able to question the society and  recognize the racism that he was encountering.   his theories on race and stereotypes were well-written, articulate and revealed many truths.  it was refreshing because it was not something i was expecting.

fresh off the boat, not only schooled me on race but pop culture as well.  eddie is very much into hip-hop, and his memoir is filled with lyrics and thankfully footnotes for the unhip like me.  he is also into

sports, so i enjoyed those analogies as well.  it was also an eye opener for me in terms of sneakerheads and street culture.  i had to google to see what shoes he was talking about but they were very cool.  i also enjoyed the lesson on polo, i looked up the sweatshirt that he referenced.  it was a great lesson that subculture for me.  oh and it was definitely cool that he made those obama shirts!  i wish i knew about them cos i would have copped one.

as you can see this book covered a variety of topics:  food, race, culture, hip hop, sports, etc.  i mean it was highly entertaining and informative.  eddie huang is an amazing person, he is more than just a chef or fun tv personality.  he has a depth that i would not have expected.  i admire him immensely and can't wait until i get to eat baohaus!  and if you are going to read a book this year, make it this one.  you will laugh, you might cry, you'll have an ah-ha moment about racism in america and learn some hip hop lyrics as well.  oh and you will definitely get hungry!  lol