one more time. carol burnett. (315)

i decided to read one more time after reading about carol burnett's life in gumption.  offerman discussed burnett growing up poor and on welfare, something that surprised me.  the bibliography mentioned her memoir and so i put in a request.

as i may have discussed earlier, i spent one summer, home on vacation, watching the carol burnett show.  my grandma said she used to love it and so i started to watch reruns and of course fell in love.  i didn't become a fanatic but did spend that summer loving her show.  my grandma also shared how she would give her ear a tug to say hello to her family.  

with how successful burnett is, i was surprised to learn about her childhood on welfare.  i would have never thought of her as having such humble beginnings but burnett is a true example of the american dream.

burnett's home life growing up reminded me of my own.  we both had absent fathers though hers was an alcoholic, and we were both very close to our grandmothers.  her being her grandma's shadow reminded me of my grandma bea.  i wasn't as clingy as burnett, but i also did everything with my grandma and had anxiety over the idea that she would die when i was little (both of our grandmothers lived into our adulthood).  

burnett was under the care of her grandmother because her mother had moved out to hollywood.  her mother was in and out of work and later on in carol's life suffered from alcoholism as well.  due to her parents lack of employment and disease, her grandma and she were on welfare. though poor, burnett's childhood was exciting.  she and her grandmother moved out to hollywood.  it was interesting to read about her live in hollywood and picturing the streets and corners she talked about.    it was fun to read about her growing up and being a teen in hollywood. 

this memoir covered burnett's life up to her big break into the entertainment industry, but it's was sprinkled with stories from her recent life. sharing how people from her past reappeared.  i like the story of her giving a grandmother and her granddaughter $50 to take a cab after she saw them waiting for a bus and was reminded of waiting with her grandma and how much she hated the bus.  i also liked when one of the popular girls from high school came to carol's table at dinner to say she was a fan and didn't remember carol from high school.

the other tales that stand out where how she was truly lucky when it came to her success.  for example, she had applied to UCLA but could not afford the tuition. however, on the day her fees were due, $50 showed up in her mailbox, with her name on it, but no return address.  thanks to this surprise, she went to UCLA.  also, i had no idea she was a fellow bruin!

another great story was her benefactor. after performing in honor of one of her mentors, she spoke with a man about her future plans.  she explained that she needed to be in new york to make it big, and he asked what was stopping her and she explained money.  he then set up a meeting with her later in the week.  at the meeting, he loaned her $1000 to be paid back in 5 years.  with she moved to new york, struggled a bit, but as we know made it!  her benefactor never was named, but as we learned in a story, was very proud of her success.

it may seem like luck, but burnett wouldn't be as successful if she wasn't such a hard worker.  she was determined to make it and took chances and due to it became the wonderful comedienne genius that she is!  

this memoir was a delight and i look forward to reading her other one.  i have to add this memoir reminded me of the importance of persevering our own stories.  this memoir was written for her kids to know her life story, which is something everyone should do.  

just kids. patti smith. (313)

patti smith's just kids has been on my to-read list forever.  i even have a copy of it on my kindle.  however, i never got around to reading it, even thought everyone was raving about it when it first came out.  however, with her new book m train, coming out, i decided it was time for me to finally read just kids.

i hate to admit this, but i'm not familiar with any of her music.  i do know that her first album is horses. and i did hear her once at the santa monica pier for a free concert (we were on the beach, so i didn't see her).  sadly, i can't name one of her songs, nor recognize any.  actually, i can recognize, "because the night", but that is only because my boss played it for me once, when i told her i was reading this memoir.

even with a lack of music knowledge, and i apologize, because i know it makes me a total poser, but i absolutely loved this memoir and adore patti smith.  so much so that i got a ticket to see her talk next month for lapl's aloud series.  her story is amazing and she has such a beautiful spirit, one can not help but love her after reading this work.

oh and i have another faux pas, i didn't know who robert mapplethorpe was prior to reading this as well.  i know i am an terrible soul.   i did enjoy learning about his life and work in this memoir.  though i have to admit i'm not sure i would have the stomach for some of his s&m photography.  though i loved the tie rack that he had made for patti, it was beautiful.  i am sure i would have loved his necklaces, as well.

what i loved most about "just kids" was that patti smith was in new york during a very exciting time.  this memoir is filled with incredible stories.  patti and robert lived at hotel chelsea. prior to this work, i only knew it as the place were sid stabbed nancy, but it has a richer and less graphic history.  the people that she ran into while living in that hotel was incredible.  i loved reading about her interactions with william s. burroughs and salvador dali at the chelsea hotel.  and it's crazy because majority of the people she mentioned in her stories are people that i admire and think of as living in the past, but really it was not that long ago, i mean dali was alive during my lifetime.  granted, 6-year-old me was not a fan of his work when he died, it's odd to think we were on the earth at the same time.  this type of realization is what made patti's adventures in new york, so exciting for me.  the same went with her and robert's visits to max's kansas city and hanging out with people from warhol's factory.  what a cool scene to be apart of, though patti never felt she belonged until she got her keith richard's hair cut.  she was right in the heart of all of the exciting art and music that was being created in new york during that time.

here are some of my favorite stories that patti shared:
-when allen ginsberg mistook her for a boy and hit on her by offering to give her money for a sandwich
-hanging out with janis jopling and telling her that she looked like a pearl
-talking to hendrix outside of an art opening

but it wasn't just the celebrities stories that were incredible, but just being in new york.  it's incredible how patti came to new york with absolutely nothing and made it work.  i wish i had that kind of courage, but now i am too old to know better.  i should have moved to new york when i was young.  though i don't know if i would have had what it takes to survive in new york.  patti shared how her first days in new york were spent living on the street and searching for a food with a man she met.  i don't know if i could have done that. the memoir was also filled with her scraping money together to eat and pay rent.  it wasn't easy, but then again i think that was a part of being new york at the time (and to some extend that holds true today).  quick digression, it was also a very different new york.  a much grittier place than it is now.  it was funny to read about times square as a place for gigolos, considering how commericalized it is now.  i mean on one hand, it's great, but sad to think that CBGB's is now a john varvatos boutique!

i feel like i'm doing a poor job describing why this work is so amazing, but you really have to just read it for yourself.

i guess what makes just kids outstanding is her relationship with robert.  it reminded me of my twenties with my best friend.  he and i would roam around los angeles, looking for open bars, and always finding adventure.  it took me back to a carefree time of just enjoying life.  furthermore, it reminded me how important it is to have a friend that understands you.  it was beautiful to read about how patti and robert inspired each other with their art.  they produced their best work when they had each other in mind.  their relationship was special and i am glad that patti smith decided to share it with all of us.

this memoir really is great and i highly recommend it, even if you aren't familiar with her music or her poetry.  this work will fill your heart and have you smiling to yourself.

again i'm sorry for this bad write up, i feel like i didn't capture what made this memoir great without recounting everything that happen and in that case you just need to read it.  i will close with one spoiler, where the title came from.  one day, patti and robert were in washington square, when a woman told her husband to take a picture of them, thinking they might be artist. and his reply was, "oh, go on . . .they're just kids."

i was told there'd be cake. sloane crosley. (280)

i decided to reread i was told there'd be cake because sloane crosley was at bookcon.  unfortunately, i didn't see her. i also didn't finish the book before i left.  i had about a chapter left and thought i could download the ebook from the library, however, they didn't have the ebook so i didn't finish before bookcon.  i did when i came back.

to start, i have to say that on my first reading, i absolutely love love loved this collection of essays.  i felt like sloane was writing about my life, so many times, i was like OMG that is me, especially the you ponies! i also had/have a bunch of toy ponies because my best friend and i used to carry one around like the amelie gnome. so right of the back, i was like i love this book.

other than that, i didn't remember too much.

i have to say i enjoyed my rereading.  crosley is hilarious and this book had me laughing.

"the pony problem" was as enjoyable as my first read and i really think she messed up by getting rid of her ponies!

i enjoyed reading about crosley's experince as a jew at christian camp in "christmas in july". and loved that she played mary! i also would have loved to have told off darien.

"the ursula cookie" made cringe when she got caught in her lie by her boss.  it was also interesting to head her day after 9/11 story though then she didn't realized that it would be a day after 9/11 story.

any and every 90's kid has to love the oregon trail essay, "bring-your-machete-to-work day", i did!  i wish someone would make it an iphone app.  like the og version.

having a unique name myself, i didn't get why she was so bent out of shape with her own name in "bastard out of westchester".  however, i did get the how the story behind her name was not true.  the verdict on my name is still out, not sure if steve garvey (of dodgers game) has a daughter named krisha.  just googled and he did!

"the kindness of stranger", which crosley discussed her luck with always getting her wallet back when she lost it, reminded me of me and my phone.  i have lost my phone at least 3 times in my life and it had always been returned to me.  then, one day in nyc, i came across a phone and tried to return it, then bragged about my lost phone luck, only to lose my phone an hour later.  it was not returned to me.  eff my life.

"one-night bounce" proved that me and crosley would totally be friends.  her desire to have a one night stand would be something we would both obsess over.  and yes, i have had a one-night stands, fun from what i can remember.

"sign language for infidels" made me want to volunteer at a natural history museum.  i googled the atlas moth, and it does look like a snake!!

"you on a stick" makes me want to never be a bridesmaid and an amazing not demanding bride. 

"smell this" was gross.  who does that?!?!

"lay like broccoli" reminded me how mean i am to vegan and vegetarians, but obvi not as mean as they are to each other.

"fever faker" was whatever.

all in all, a delightful reread.  i regret not seeing her at bookcon and look forward go her new novel!  i also need to read her other book!

born standing up: a comic's life. steve martin. (268)

i have to admit that i wasn't a big fan of steve martin the actor.  my love for him started off with steve martin the writer.  i remember watching shopgirl because of jason schwartzman and decided to read the novella by martin.  which then resulted in me reading his books and becoming a fan of steve martin, the author.

what made me fall in love with steve martin the actor was it's complicated with meryl streep and alec baldwin.  as his character, adam, wooed streep's character, martin wooed me!  seriously them getting high was the best!  and due to all of this, i am a fan of martin, also love that he has a band.

due to all of this, born standing up has been on my to-read list but after seeing it listed somewhere as a memoir to read, i added it to my library request.

this memoir is a wonderful read.  and though it was a bit of challenge for me to imagine his stand up routines, thanks to the internet, i was able to watch his groundbreaking performance on johnny carson (it was archived on the smithsonian website!) and some of his other skits!  though i didn't find him laugh out loud hilarious, he was funny, but wonder if its a generational thing.

what i loved most was reading about was how  martin used to work at disneyland as child! he sold maps and then worked in two of the magic shops! disneyland got way more cooler for me!  he also

worked at knott's berry farm at their theater.

i also enjoyed the little tidbits he shared about his art collection as well.  like how once when leaving disneyland he came across diane arbus taking a photo of the sleeping beauty's castle.  which after googling, i was able to see what the photograph looked like.  he also discussed the influence of dalton trumbo was on his collecting of art, (he dated his daughter) and was surprised to find that trumbo wrote one of my favorite books in high school, johnny got his gun.

it was sad to read about the poor relationship martin had with his father and inadvertently with the rest of his family.  he was a bit of a loner which being on the road especially after his success grew detrimental to his mental health.  it was sad to read about how all alone he felt and he went through a very dark period on the road, which i saw as a result of his family life.  however, his relationship with his father and mother improved.  and he stopped touring which helped relief some of the stress in his life.

i have to add it was great to read about his time on snl.  today, snl has a permanent cast but it seemed like back then, he would drop in randomly to do guest appearance on the show, which seemed cool.  i don't know if he was just an exception or if that is how it was then.  and thanks to google also watch the snl skits he mentioned including  "jeopardy 1999" (which included very cute chevy chase, what a hottie when he was younger.)

i wish i was more familiar with martin's stand up routines but after reading this book will look into watching some youtube videos.  this was a wonderful memoir, i was surprised by how dark is family history was but i am now a fun of steve martin, the stand-up comedian.  

how to be a woman. caitlin moran. (251)

after reading moran's how to build a girl, i had to read how to be a woman.  and can i just say, i absolutely loved it and her.  if you are a woman, its a must read!

so this work is categorized as a memoir but i feel like it's more than that.  each chapter starts off with an event from moran's life but the lesson learned can be applied to all of us.

there is so much for me to write about, maybe i will go through chapter by chapter.  well maybe just favorite chapters.

"i become furry" in this chapter, moran discussed when her pubic hair began to grow and how she would shave it because she was scared of growing up and of course it.  this segues into a discussion on how we women work so hard to be hairless.  she shares how so much planning occurs when women go to a party via a conversation with a friend, which made me laugh cos it is so true.  her friend uncertain if she is going to sleep with this guy after a party, doesn't know if and when she should get waxed.  seriously it's such a bitch to have to deal with pubic hair.  you know my hurt hand?  it's from me trying to wax my upper life by myself before meeting up with a boy i thought i was in love with.  i mean i have given up on daily maintenance for my bush that only gets spruced up when i think someone is going to see it.  (if i was in a committed relationship, it would only get spruced up on special occasions, hence why i might still be single.) but i feel like i should have pubic hair, i'm an adult woman not a prepubescent child.  i refuse to be completely hairless down there, i mean i do clean it up when it needs to be but for the most part i let it be.  also nipple hair, i used to be so embarrassed by mine, but then now i just shave it when i need to.  i am a person, we have hair.  i mean the one on top of my head is quite lovely.  i think that should be the main focus.  and just like moran shared at the end, when she lost her virginity, the man did not care what the state of her pubic hair was.  its like my friend peter would always tells us in college, guys don't care if your underwear matches your bra, its just going to end up coming off anyway.

"i don't know what to call my breast".  this of course discussed finally getting breast and how they are referred to as.  this lead into a discussion on what to call your vagina.  i for one use vagina.  as a child growing up, our family didn't give it a nickname it was just our private part.  but what caused my decision to use vagina as the term to refer to my vagina was that one time at my work, a little girl told one of my tutor's that her vagina hurt. the tutor was so surprised by her use of vagina, but i mean the girl was right that was what she had.  we told her mom, it turns out she had been having some urinary issues and the mom also explained that she didn't want her daughter to use some silly term for her vagina so had her call it that.  i decided to do the same.

"i am a feminist".  so i have been on a bit of feminist kick since last year, after reading bad feminist, i have always seen myself as a feminist, but i feel like i am truly embracing it and this book reminded me why we need to reclaim this title.  as i shared on my instagram page:

love her for this!! but seriously this book isn't some feminist agenda, well it kinda is, but it's really just some good ol' girl talk about women issues.  though i will say i didn't always agree with what moran wrote, but then again, i don't have to, part of this new feminism is allowing acceptance of all ideas as long as progress is being made for women.  but if you are a woman and you want to be treated as an equal, then guess what, you are a feminist!

"i am in love", caitlin shared her horrible boyfriend that she thought she could change and from which she took abuse because she thought it was love.  we all have had this type of situation.  i blame romantic comedies for making us think we can change men that really aren't good for us.

"i go lap-dancing".  i felt guilty when i read it, because i have always been a bit of a "cool" girl, a guy's i mean strip clubs are gross, its a place men go to have women dance for them.  

"i get into fashion" fashion is expensive and i like moran don't spend a lot on handbags.  she did once and it was stolen.  though i am glad she wrote about how horrible heels are.  i really wish i could walk in them.  i recently discovered that my arch doesn't rest completely on the arc of the shoe so this might be why i can't wear heels. or maybe i am flat foot, i don't know.  i need to go see someone to verify this.

"abortion" what i admired about this piece was that moran was completely honest about having an abortion.  she didn't have one because she was too young, or unwed, or even sick, but because she knew she could not handle having another child.  that sounds horrible and insensitive but its honest.  she discussed how there is a notion of "good aids" ie someone getting it via blood transfusion and "bad aids" someone that gets its via drug needles.  the same kind be said for abortion.  moran got what some would consider a "bad abortion."  it appears selfish, but not all women are mothers, trust me i have worked with kids my whole life and some people are truly unfit to be mothers.  why bring a child into the world if you can not care for it like a mother should?  i know it sounds insensitive because life is life, a baby didn't choose to be born, but at the same time there is so much suffering in the world, why add to it.  at the end of the day, it's the pregnant woman's choice, she is the only one that can make the right decision for herself.  it might not be something that everyone agrees with, but then again are only truly responsible for ourselves.  

moran discussed a handful of other topics as well, pornography, childbirth (her first birth really grossed me out, i couldn't read it), bras, role models, and plastic surgery.  oh and growing up in the nineties, she writes alot about the riot grrl movement, which i need to revisit.  my roommate samira introduced me to bikini kill and bratmobile, so i have a taste but i need to get some more!

i just realized that this blog is about how my life relates to what she wrote about versus analysis of what she wrote.  but you need to read it and enjoy it yourself!  and all in all though it does explain how to be a woman, in the end, we learn that moran just wants to be a human, just one of the "guys" (which i think discredits her notions of feminism, because it still holds up equality on male terms.  but hey you can't win them all.  and regardless, this was funny book to read, so i forgive her!

can't we talk about something more pleasant?: a memoir. roz chast. (250)

i had seen roz chast's memoir, can we talk about something more pleasant? on a handful of must read list.  however, i didn't start paying attention until i saw it included on best of 2014 lists and since i realized i hadn't read many of the books listed on the best of 2014 lists (though i have read books that came out in 2014), i decided to check it out.

prior to this memoir, i was not familiar with chast work.  she is a cartoonist for the new yorker.  i also was not familiar with the premise for the book.  based on the title and the cover, i thought it was going to be a fun stories of how parents get senile as they grow older and the odd conversations we have with them.  however, it is actually about her dealing with her parents aging and their deaths.  whenever chast tried to have a conversation about death, "can we talk about something more pleasant?" would be her parents' response.  i have to admit that i was a little bit worried about reading this because it has been a year since my grandmother death.  i was worried about it bringing up painful memories or that i might just randomly burst into tears.  it didn't.  though it reminded me how grateful i was to be with my grandma in her final years of life.  i always claimed that it was good for me to be back home for her to keep an eye on me but in reality, it was better to have her taking care of me.

being a graphic memoir, i actually finished the book in a day, probably closer to an afternoon.  it was an enjoyable read though it did remind me that i have a rough time ahead of me as my mom starts to grow older.  in fact, my aunt tracey and my uncle bob too.  but i don't want to think about that now.

the memoir is completely honest.  it covers all of the anxiety and stress that comes with dealing with aging parents.  and chast is a little neurotic and i was often shocked by how she reacted to some events.  for example, when chast's mother had her fall and went to the er, chast did not go to the hospital until a couple of hours after she got the phone call.  i understand that each person deals with emergencies in their own way, but i don't know how she didn't immediately rush to the hospital.  another time i was shocked was when her mother was released and instead of spending the night with her parents, she went back home.  again some people are different.  and i hate to be judgy, because it is tough and i have no idea what i would do if i was in that situation, i mean she is an only child and when i go through this i will have my siblings as support.  i hate to be so mean, but it was still shocking to read. 

and i know that its easier to said then done, but i can honestly say that i have done.  i'm not saying that i am better than chast and i hate to seem so judgy. but i am extremely squeamish when it comes to hospitals, like i could never sit through the emergency scenes in "ER" or the surgery scenes of "nip/tuck", however, i was always fine with staying overnight in the hospital room with my grandma.  in fact, my sister and i stayed with her in icu, one of the nights we were warned could be one of her last (thankfully we had her for a couple more weeks).  

and please don't take the examples as what time person chast.  she was actually very dedicated to making sure her parents were taken care of and comforted.  those were just two incidents that stuck out to me as i read.  there is alot more beauty to this book.  there is of course some humor, and i plan on reading more of her works.  it s a beautiful work in which she pays tribute to her parents and gives a very honest view of how tough it is to deal with death.

a story lately told: coming of age in ireland, london, and new york. anjelica huston (211)

last weekend, after a trip to la, i decided to stay with my auntie trace and uncle karl.  while awaiting for them to pick me up from the amtrak, i decided to check out the used book section at the beale library.  i didn't find anything to buy but did come across anjelica huston's memoir, a story lately told:  coming of age in ireland, london, and new york.  i love her because of her work with wes anderson, and of course the witches, so decided to check it out.

i wasn't sure what to expect, i mean, she is etheline tenebaum!  the lost mother of darjeeling limited and morticia adams!! this memoir had to be extraordinary!! but sadly it wasn't.

this memoir lacked heart. it is almost as though huston wrote it simply to make money versus sharing her life.  could she be doing that bad? i mean i did just look up her imdb, she has been voicing tinkerbell movies, maybe she is hurting?  it also seemed like she didn't want to be outdone by her sister, allegra, who she thanked in the acknowledgements for inspiring her.  if it was personal growth, she needs to try digging deeper.

the one thing that i took from this memoir  is that huston likes to namedrop.  if feel bad (due mostly to this memoir) but didnt realize that huston's father was a famous director, like the african queen famous.  and due to this huston's childhood was very glamorous filled with hollywood's elite always randomly dropping by their home.  i would say 50% of the time discussed about ireland was just names of celebrities.  so many people were named, all minor characters, that i lost track and could not keep everyone straight. (though i must admit that i was impressed by the namedropping of john steinbeck.) the remaining 50% of the ireland era was spent discussing the description of their mansion and their horses.  it lacked funny little anecdotes one has as a child.  the only one i can remember is huston being embarassed while performing macbeth but that turned out to be peter o'toole's memory and not her own.

the london era was filled with the same namedropping.  marianne faithfull was mentioned.  also the fact that the director of romeo and juliet was interested in casting huston as juliet but her father wanted her in his film. i hate to be mean but can not imagine her as juliet that film as it was made is perfection.  also i felt like huston's #teenageproblems about doing the film were an excuse for her poor performance.

the london era was also when huston lost her mother in a car accident.  it was a tragedy that huston discussed without any feeling.  maybe it was too difficult for her to discuss honestly, but if she wanted to pay tribute to her mother, she missed her chance. it was a very distant discussion of a very tragic event in her life.

the new york era covered her absuive relationship with bob richardson, who is terry richardson's dad!  while googling for photos of a young anjelica huston (she was gorgeous), saw one of terry and huston which seemed odd but now after reading this it's even odder.  richardson, a successful photographer and like twentysomething years her senior was crazy and controlling for lack of a better description.  she was young and sadly put up with it until she realized how horrible her life was on trip to mexico and finally left him.  again, the lack of emotion of heart was even seen in the discussion of this relationship.  

i must admit i did find myself romantizing the gritty new york scene huston was apart of, ie living at the chelsea hotel (yes even with its creepy stories).  also all of her modeling in europe sounded so glamourous as well, though she seemed a little thin-skinned initially, crying at a nyc go-see.

as i mentioned before this memoir was not that interested and read more like a who's who of hollywood.  i was looking forward to reading funny little anecdotes about her growing up and coming of age, but every story just seemed like the means for her to brag about something.  

though i should add, by reading between the lines, one can find the inspiration for her amazing performances in wes anderson films.  for as glamourous her parents were they were absent from most of her life.  they were also more concerned with their own love affairs then the raising of her children.  perhaps it is this lack of parenting growing up that huston drew as inspiration for the messed up mothers she played in anderson films.  to take it one step further, she is also channeling her mother with her depictions of ex-wives of insensitive yet creative men in anderson's films.  though this epiphany is not enough to justify reading the memoir, just watch a wes anderson film instead to see huston at her finest.

oh and i will add, i also learned through photos that huston dated jack nicholson (hich i didn't know), now that is memoir i want to read!

relish. lucy knisley. (210)

i firrst heard of relish on flavorpill.  i was actually going to buy it, a graphic novel about food, of course i would love it.  however, it sat on my amazon wish list for a while, actually where it still is. i am not sure what prompted me to finally check it out, i think it was a post about foodie books.

anyway, so relish is actually not a graphic novel but a graphic memoir.  and its an adorable little book that features stories from lucy knisley's life and recipes to go along with it.  and of course the illustrations are adorable as well.

knisley came from a family of foodies, her mother was a caterer and was all about farm fresh before farm fresh became a thing, and her father just liked good food.  also her godfather was a food critic and her uncle joined a food store in nyc.  all her life knisley was surrounded by good food.  

the graphic memoir is a handful of stories and as i mentioned recipes that go along with the story.  well except for one, knisley shared how in venice she had these delicious croissants that were filled with apricot jam.  she tried her best to recreate them but couldn't do it.  instead of having a croissant recipe there was one for sangria!  

the memoir is short so i won't go into too much detail on the stories.  though i will add that i really enjoyed the story about her coming of age in mexico and seeing all the fun things she ate in japan!  

and though i don't cook, i was excited about the recipes.  maybe i will make something one day, the lamb sounded delish,  maybe i can get my sister to make it.  i will add that i did learn that you shouldn't wash your mushrooms!  you should brush them clean or if you do, make sure to let them dry before they are sauteed.  i love mushrooms so will start doing that.

all in all a delightful little book, i mean it ended with a bradbury quote from dandelion wine!!

i also decided to include some illustrations, since it is a graphic memoir.

this will be my to-eat list when i am in chicago (i really need to plan a trip there, maybe next year?)

a recipe for carbonara, i should really try to make it!

and i just loved this little quote:

so if you love food, you should check this out.  and if you make anything from it, invite me over!

a heartbreaking work of staggering genius. dave eggers. (208)

i have discussed this before but i do have hipster tendencies.  so when the huffington post listed the most hipster books of all time, and i had only read a handful of them, i decided to check them out.  i started with dave eggers' a heartbreaking work of staggering genius.

i feel horrible for saying this, especially considering it's premise, a memoir about raising a younger sibling after both parents passing away, but i hated this book.  it took everything i had to actually finish it.  ironically, i should have listened to the rules and suggestions for enjoyment of this book (which is listed at the beginning) it suggested that "the first three or four chapters are all some of you might want to bother with.  that gets you to page 109 or so, which is a nice length, a nice novella sort of length."  i thought eggers was being cheeky when in fact he was just being honest, he knew the second half wasnt' worth it. 

 

a heartbreaking work of staggering genius covers eggers' early twenties and what he encountered raising his little brother, tophe, after having lost both their parents within three months of each other.  they lost their mother to stomach cancer, and the father to what i am assumed was a heart condition  (i feel eggers really didn't share what happen to him, other than his sister finding him kneeling in the driveway one night), since he was a heavy drinker and smoker.  due to the title and the premise, i imagined myself having an emotional connection to the book having just lost my grandmother.  i was actually very hesitant about reading, worried that it would stir up too many memories and thoughts that i was not ready to revisit.  i will admit that reading about their mother is icu was difficult to read, i did cry, reminded of being in icu with my grandmother. and later in the book when eggers discussed his speaking at this mother's memorial service (their parents donated their bodies to science so there wasn't a formal burial), i understood what he went through.  i do recall when my grandmother first entered icu, i thought about what i would say at her funeral.  one feels bad for thinking such thoughts but its something that needs to be considered.  i also identified with egger's uncertainity when it came to speaking at the service.  i was the same way, wanting to share but not wanting too.  though i will add, i didn't want pity like he did but to honor my grandmother.  but that was as far as my identification and enjoyment of the book went.

my enjoyment, seriously only went up until page 109, because that is the only part that truly discussed tophe.  the rest was pretty much about the magazine, he and his friends started, which i did not find interesting at all.  to be completely honest, the only real take away i had from the remainder of the book, was that eggers wasn't casted on mtv's real world: san francisco and that puck came to do a photo shoot for them.  well not for a feature on puck but he was a model, they needed nude models for a piece about humans being the same.  but yeah that is all i really remember.  oh and i would have appreciated the innovativeness of the real world "interview" being a means of eggers discussing his childhood, but then when he had to let the cat out of the bag, recognizing that it was a made up interview to allow for this exploration, so i started to lose interest.

i really hated it.  it was seriously just about the magazine.  it could have been a work of staggering genius if he focused on the issues that he confronted while raising his brother more than whether or not he could still get laid. 

i also think that i may have missed the mark on this book.  had i read it 2000 (though i was in high school, i maybe have been to young) this would have been revolutionary.  maybe if i read it fresh out of college, i would have enjoyed it more.  i don't know what its right, i just know that it bored me.

i also want to add that i see how the book is hipstery.  i mean this is the publishing page!

its very tongue-in-cheek and clever and i would have praised it if i loved the book.  but since i did not enjoy it, i find it excessive and annoying. 

furthermore, there is the "rules" for enjoying the book that i mentioned earlier.  in addition to that there is a preface, contents page, acknowledgements (which runs for like 10 pages and includes diagrams and a random drawing of  a stapler, seriously?!?!?!) all of which i did not read because i did not want to give this book, any more time in my life.  though i will add that in the acknowledgement section, eggers says that the first 200 people that take a picture of a book and your receipt can receive a $5 check from him.  i wonder if people really did that, i would have done that and still felt robbed because the book was horrible.  you can also send it for a fictionalized version of the book on floppy disk, i might look into purchasing that if i still can.  but yeah, i can see the coolness in this, but like anything hipster, if it sucks, one does become annoyed but it.

if a heartbreaking work of staggering genius is on your to-read list, just read up to page 109.  i can tell you the story about real world and puck so you don't have to read the rest.

fresh off the boat. eddie huang. (196)

i remember seeing fresh off the boat at barnes and noble when it first came out, but didn't considered reading it.  with that cover it seemed like something i should look into but i didn't give it much thought after that initial sighting.  

i then saw a trailer for the new abc series based on it.  here, watch it on youtube.

after seeing his mom's hair struggles,  i decided to check it out.

if you thought that trailer was hilarious, you have no idea what you are in with this book.  fresh off the boat is beyond amazing and definitely in my top 3 books i have read this year.  if i hadn't read americanah this year fresh off the boat would probably be number 1.  eddie huang is also my new celebrity chef obsession.  i could kick myself for not picking this book up when i first saw it.  if i had, i would have gone to baohaus on my last nyc trip, boo to me!

i feel like a loser and am not as hip as i think i am because i hadn't heard of eddie huang or baohaus prior to my reading of this book.  i have no idea how he was not on my radar.  he also has a shown on vice, fresh off the boat, (which the book and now abc series evolved from) which are his random, food-related adventures around cities.  eddie is like a younger, chinese, hip hop version of bourdain.  my facebook friend, che, told my friend danny about the vice show.  i looked it up and of course watched the episode with roy choi.  it was hilarious yet deep, i will definitely play catch up on that series.

back to the memoir.  to start fresh off the boat made me hungry.  the memoir opened with a story about soup dumplings and eddie's ability at a young age to recognize that the ones he and his family had were bad because of the cheap soy sauce the restaurants used.  and of course, all i could think about was how i wanted soup dumplings (but some legit ones, i need to have my friend joann take me!!)  the memoir covered chinese/tawianese  food; what is mother makes and from a trip to taipei he took when he was in high school.  he discussed staples like minced pork, tomato and eggs, and beef noodle, all of which made me hungry!!!!  to the point where i googled minced pork to see where i could get some (sadly i was in delano and the closest was bakersfield, i had to settle for the chinese food place we have in town, thankfully i didn't have to go with panda express.)  but yeah minced pork is on my to-eat list, if anyone has a place to recommend, let me know. 

the book has some great food-related stories.  i especially enjoyed the story, eddie shared of returning to a dan-dan mian cart with his father.  his father was part of a gang in taiwan.  he learned from the owner that though his father was a hoodlum, he was very moral (this was exemplified when eddie was punished for stealing).  eddie discovered that his father looked out for this cart owner and the owner did the same for him, and one day saved his father's life.  

another story, i enjoyed was the story of eddie on the food network's ultimate recipe showdown.  i need to look for it online.  he sadly didn't win because reality tv is a joke, but he was the best, everyone off set agreed so.  i loved how he came up with his recipe while stoned. actually the meat he cooked reminded me of something my grandpa used to make called red meat. and i love the irony of guy fieri encouraging eddie to not give up cooking.

it was great to read about how baohaus got started up.  again i could have kicked myself for not being in the know.  i mean i should have been more serious about moving to nyc back in 09, i could have found one of his craiglist listing.  oh well.  but definitely happy he found success and i can't wait to try baohaus on my next trip.

the book wasn't all food.  with a title like fresh off the boat, culture and race were discussed.  i enjoyed learning about his family history, especially his parents backstory.  his mother being the loudmouth and always speaking her mind and his dad's gang background.  though it was cruel, i have to admit that i thought his parents' put-downs of eddie and his brothers were hilarious.  it's wrong to laugh and their comments were borderline verbal abuse but they were funny and honest.  i mean i admired his parents for keeping it real but the physical abuse did go to far.  i understand why people spank their kids but his dad did border abuse, and like eddie i am glad that the police went to their home to at least lessen the beatings they got.  though eddie was bad and deserved some of them (i know its horrible to say a kid deserved an ass-whooping but sometimes they do.)

what shocked me the most about this memoir was eddie's compete honesty about all the trouble he got into growing up.  he put everything out there.  i mean i was a nerdy kid and so i was shocked to read about all he did.  he reminded me of my friend larry, i always said if we knew each other in high school we wouldn't have been friends, i was too much of a goodie two shoes.  but like eddie, my friend larry, got his shit together and became a better adult as should happen in life.  your younger years are for fucking around.

i was also shocked by how intelligent eddie is.  the guy went to law school!  his intelligence is demonstrated best when he discussed the racism he encountered in life.  from the kids in elementary school making fun of his lunches, up until his boss at the newspaper making a comment about his face.  i especially enjoyed learning about his teachers and professors gave him the tools he needed to be able to question the society and  recognize the racism that he was encountering.   his theories on race and stereotypes were well-written, articulate and revealed many truths.  it was refreshing because it was not something i was expecting.

fresh off the boat, not only schooled me on race but pop culture as well.  eddie is very much into hip-hop, and his memoir is filled with lyrics and thankfully footnotes for the unhip like me.  he is also into

sports, so i enjoyed those analogies as well.  it was also an eye opener for me in terms of sneakerheads and street culture.  i had to google to see what shoes he was talking about but they were very cool.  i also enjoyed the lesson on polo, i looked up the sweatshirt that he referenced.  it was a great lesson that subculture for me.  oh and it was definitely cool that he made those obama shirts!  i wish i knew about them cos i would have copped one.

as you can see this book covered a variety of topics:  food, race, culture, hip hop, sports, etc.  i mean it was highly entertaining and informative.  eddie huang is an amazing person, he is more than just a chef or fun tv personality.  he has a depth that i would not have expected.  i admire him immensely and can't wait until i get to eat baohaus!  and if you are going to read a book this year, make it this one.  you will laugh, you might cry, you'll have an ah-ha moment about racism in america and learn some hip hop lyrics as well.  oh and you will definitely get hungry!  lol

little failure. gary schteyngart. (171)

when i read the flavorpill post recommending little failure as a must read for january, i hadn't read anything by gary shteynart, (i still haven't read anything by him other than this, my plan to read super sad true love story prior to this was spoiled because this book was due last tuesday.  yup, it cost me about $3.50 to read this book!) but with that cute cover and clever title, i decided to check it out.

even with my lack of familiarity with shteyngart's works, i was still able to enjoy his memoir.  plus it still revealed to me the not so shocking truth that shteyngart's fiction is primarily made up of his life (like all authors). since i have read a couple chapters of super sad true love story, i have to admit i did become confused between what i had read about lenny's parents and shteyngart's actual parents, which make sense because they are one and the same.  it was interesting to see that eunice was based on the korean school girls of his youth, prior to learning this i found her an odd character.  and now with this new background knowledge, i do look forward to reading the rest of shteynart's work, knowing who some of the characters are based on. 

the book was entertaining, it might be as flavorpill claimed, the best memoir i read this year but mostly because i might not read any other memoirs this year.  shteyngart is a great storyteller, very funny and witty.  for those of you that are unfamiliar with his background, shteynart is russian and jewish and immigrated to america with his family at a young age.  his memoir shares: his family history, his memories of russia, his education (from jewish grade school to a prestigious math and science academy to oberlin college), his works, how he became an writer and a family trip back to russia.  i enjoyed the stories of his youth more than i did his tales from college and breaking into the literary world.  i have to admit that he truly was horrible during his return to saturn phrase (but than again who isn't) but i can not believe how one-sided his relationship with his best friend john was, i mean to be honest, i guess i can because i have been the gary in friendships, but imagine my contributions being worth more than my demands.

but back to his childhood, i loved the story of his grandma galya motivating him to write a novel as a child, giving him a piece of cheese for every page written.  i also loved his teacher ms. s who had him read his novel to his class.  it was adorable how excited his class about his novel.  also the subject matter, sci-fi story on one level but a discussion of race relations on another, was quite advance for a child.  also it was interesting to see how his stories as an adult are not that different from his stories as a child.

i also enjoyed seeing the world filtered through his russian immigrant mindset especially pop culture.  for example wondering about "the origins of the white slave alice" on the brady bunch or "is it really possible that a country as powerful as the united states would not be able to locate two of its best citizens lost at sea" in gilligan's island.  the book is filled with gems like this not only of pop culture but american life in general.

and maybe it's because i miss my grandma so much, but i loved reading about his grandmas.  my grandma bea always encouraged me to write and draw pictures like his grandma galya.  my grandma was just like his grandma polya provided my sister and i with the best desserts and snacks.  however, her providing must have came with limits for her.  but two amazing grandmas that reminded me of my one exceptional one!

i also enjoyed reading about his family's trip back home to russia.  his father opening up to him about his time in a psychiatric ward.  in that light, i read his father's comment about his wish that shteyngart was gay instead of seeing a psychoanalyst, as him worried that his son would be mistreated as he was in russia.  also partially because his father must have partly blamed his genetics for his son needing help.  it was crazy to hear how cruel his parents were to him but it was a tough love, something they did to help him survive.  also anger was an expression of love from his parents which shteyngart learned to deal with thanks to his psychoanalysis.

oh and one last thing, that story about his ex that stabbed her ex with a hammer!! that was insane!

all in all, it was an enjoyable read. i wouldn't call it a must read but it's good book to check out, if you like his work.  it has inspired to read the all of shteygnart.  it also inspired me to read nils and the wild geese and the boy from ufo, two books he loved as a child.  i also look forward to reading chang-rae lee's book, native speaker, because he aided shteyngart in getting his book deal (also because his new book has been mentioned everywhere.) and last but not least i have been inspired to one day visit the chesme church, which was a focal point of this memoir and thus shteyngart's life.  it's a truly lovely building:

kiki's memoirs. alice prin. (153)

as i was reading the graphic novel, kiki de monteparnasse, i began to wonder where the stories told came from.  so i searched the library catalog and came across kiki's memoirs, written by kiki with an introduction by ernest hemingway!  

when i picked kiki's memoirs up, i was surprised by how thin it was, i wanted all the juicy details from her life and wasn't sure if the memoirs would give them all to me.

the first half of the memoirs are kiki or her actual name alice prin's actual memoirs .  she explained how her grandmother raised her along with her five other cousins, all who were bastards (for lack of a better word).   when she was 12, she moved to paris to be with her mother.  she worked odd jobs and longed for love.  then due to an argument with the baker she worked for kiki ended up with her first art job, posing for a sculptor.  she then began modeling for various artists and even painted her own art.  her biggest contribute to the art world was a result of her she meeting american surrealist man ray.  she became his muse and together they created beautiful art specifically photography.  here are some of my favorites and of course their most famous photograph:

kiki's memoirs were a bit confusing to read, it jumped around and she shared odd details but they were interesting since she was quite the character.  

one interesting story kiki discussed was the time that she was in jail for assaulting an officer but luckily man ray came to help her and she was released.

the later half of the memoirs is an interview from a paris newspaper.  i enjoyed this portion more because kiki was older, 50, and wiser.

there was one story, kiki shared about her grandmother that caused my admiration of  her grandmother for raising the grandchildren.  kiki shared how the neighbors told her to turn to public assistance for helping raising the kids to which she responded "i will raise my bastard, its nobody else's business.  it's the jerks their fathers who should be blamed."  everyone likes to blame the woman for bastard children but people forget that they have fathers too.

i loved how kiki was not ashamed of her bastard status.  she shared how she would run into her half sister and the sister would tell her, "i am going to tell my father" to which kiki responded "i don't give a damn, he's my father too."  

however, kiki's father was horrible, she shared a story of him trying to poison to kill her but her grandmother saved her. being abandoned by both parents caused much pain for kiki, as she sadly shared "no one knows what sorrow fills the heart of a child who doesn't have a father, whose mother is far away and whose only tenderness in life comes from a grandmother."

kiki's childhood was filled with sadness and misery.  she shared words of wisdom as she reflected on her sad memories.  she explained "when you meet an ugly and neglected little girl with her head shaved like an egg, don't laugh:  pitiful hair makes grown-ups loath but little ones cry."  from when her grandfather died, "death among poor people is not a catastrophe as it is among the rich, and when you have slaved all your life and barely succeeded in feeding yourself, the final departure is considered a deliverance."  kiki also shared about her mother's cold indifference towards her.  she discussed how she would become embarassed when other kids called their mothers, "mama dear."  she explained that she "would have let all [her] pain and [her] desire to be able say 'mama', since i was never permitted to say papa . . ."  how sad to feel unloved as a child.  however though her childhood was tragic, her life improved because of art.  it wasn't all glamour but when it was it was, it was glam!

the interview was not all sad stories.  kiki shared stories that demonstrated her colorful and vivacious spirit.  one of my favorite stories was how she took lace samples from a catalog and pinned them to her coat so that they looked like a beautiful blouse which people would compliment!  i also delighted in her stories about peré libion, who supported artists by feeding them at his restaurant.  i loved how at the one opening he brought champagne explaining he had provided everything else he might as well provide that (the artist had stolen place settings from his restaurant.  lol)

it was an interesting read and nice to see kiki discuss herself in her own words.  since it was brief, it left me wanting to know more which i will hopefully discover in the graphic novel.

ps i have to add kiki shared how her mother told her "country bumpkin you are and country bumpkin you shall be." i am country bumpkin that loves the city but feel that regardless of how far away i may move away, i am still a little bit country!