have you seen marie? sandra cisneros. (75)

i discovered that cisneros had written a new book at her talk but was waiting to finish "war & peace" before i put in a request. the other day while picking up tickets to see barry manilow at the rabobank arena. i convinced my mom, that we should check out the beale library. and since i stumbled upon "have you seen marie?", i decided to check it out.

i didn't know much about it. but it was not as i expected. it is short book and has illustrations. (i would find out later that cisneros intended on the book being an children's book for adults, which explains the illustrations). the book opened with marie running away. this scared me because i imagined marie as a young girl, but it turned out marie was a cat. if you know me and pets, i would not worry about a missing cat.

in fact, i didn't enjoy this book at all. it read like a bad parody of the p.d. eastman classic, "are you my mother?". i understood what cisneros was trying to do, her story was about loss and how everyone suffers from some sort of loss. the narrator's mother had just passed away and the story demonstrated how even though she is suffering from it, others are suffering too from loss of family members or sight or memories. however, the book did not remind me of the children books of my youth nor did it arouse in me a sentiment of love or sadness. it felt too forced, the book was trying too hard to be something it was not.

i wasn't a fan of the illustrations either, there were only two drawings i enjoyed.

in this part of the story, the river explained to the narrator how it would take her tears and carry them along all the rivers in the world and that everything mix together.

i also loved his drawing.

in this passage, her mother's spirit whispers to the narrator via the wind, the clouds and that stars her mother is with her.

these examples are the best part of the actual story. the heart and soul of this book and what makes it great is the afterword.

in the afterword, cisneros shares with the reader the backstory for this book and after reading that i had a deeper respect for the book. it should be a foreword instead of an afterward because it helps contextualize the story. the story, the reader discovers, is a true story. the cat did go missing and the story is about their search. the neighbors are really her neighbors, which i found cool, imagine being immortalized in a cisneros book. and knowing that it was based on life made the story more interesting.

in the afterward, the reader also learns that cisneros lost her mother and wrote this to deal with the grieving.

she wrote:

"in the spring after my mother died, a doctor wanted to prescribe pills for depression. "but if i don't feel," i said, "how will i be able to write?" i need to be able to feel things deeply, good or bad, and wade through an emotion to the other shore, toward my rebirth. i knew if i put off moving through the grief, the wandering between worlds would only take longer. even sadness has its place in the universe.

i wish someone has told me that death allows you the chance to experience the world soulfully, that the heart is open like the aperture of a camera, taking in everything, painful as well as joyous, sensitive as the skin of water.

[ . . . ]

i wish somebody had told me love does not die, that we can continue to receive and give love after death. this news is so astonishing to me even now, i wonder why it isn't flashed across the bottom of the television screen on CNN."

i appreciated how cisneros discussed how it is okay to be sad. i enjoy being sad because it makes me feel human. i think it's healthy to be sad, we should not feel this constant pressure to be happy. sadness is as valid an emotion as any of them.

i also loved the last paragraph i quoted. it is true, we do need to talk more about how love does not die and that it continues on. and it's true, when i talk about my grandma jimmy, my heart does fill with joy because his love still exist in the world even though he may not.

so how with that passage can i say that story was bad. because cisneros was unable to capture the beauty of her afterword in the story. i would almost recommend to those that pic up to not even bother with the story and just read the afterword. or make the afterword a foreword.

i believe that the way cisneros discusses death in the afterword is what makes a worthy book. it is sweet and thoughtful and i can imagine it providing comfort to anyone who has lost a parent or loved one.