brown girl dreaming. jacqueline woodson. (260)

i checked out jacqueline woodson's brown girl dreaming after i read that it won the national book award for young people's literature.  i remember seeing articles about someone making an offensive joke at the awards ceremony but regardless was still excited for

it's win and couldn't wait to read it.

this book was truly amazing.  it is a collection of poems which made me weary, because i am not good with poetry. however, it was free verse and read more like prose then poetry.  as a whole, the poems are a memoir, sharing woodson's life growing up in both the north and south during the civil rights era.  the poems also share woodson's childhood dream of becomig a writer.

i initially considered getting this book as a gift for my friend tiffany but figured i should read a book first before i gift it.  i really wish i had just given it to her.  the beginning of the book reminded me of her parents.  her father grew up in the south and her mother in california and just like jacqueline's parents, their experiences with discrimation and racism in america differed.  papa gibson is always telling us stories about how it was in the south and mama gibson shares how she never experienced any of that.  woodson's father's family in the north lived in a very different america then her mother's family in the south. it was inspiring to see how woodson's family from the north had a long string of professionals in their family which fueled a desire for success for the younger generations.  yet at the same time it was frustrating to see her mother's family still suffering from discrimination due to jim crow laws. 

brown girl dreaming is more then just a memoir because through her poems woodson tells a part of america's history that normally goes untold or unstudied.  her poems covered the meetings held by marchers, the training necessary for lunch counter sit-ins, the rise of the black panther movement, choosing to wear one's hair natural, there was even a poem about angela davis.  woodson gave voice to the black experience in america. 

her poems also shared woodson's personal history, her time as a baby in ohio, then in the south when her parents divorce and finally in new york.  due to this i connected to the poems personally. since woodson was raised by her grandparents in the south, i related to the poems about them.  some of her poems reminded me of my grandma bea and grandpa jimmy.  "the blanket" woodson shared how when her mom first left for new york, they were not sad because:

. . . the weight 

of our grandparents' love like a blanket

with us beneath it

safe and warm.

though my mother was a single mom, i never felt at a disadvantage because my grandparents' love was greater than i would have had from my father.

"two gods, two worlds" reminded me of my grandpa jimmy.  he was a muslim and i was raised mormon.  as i have shared before, i didn't understand why we would be separated in heaven simply because of our faiths shouldn't our love for each other be more important?  in this poem, woodson who is jehovah wondered what will happen to her grandfather based in lessons she learned about armageddon.  the poem ended with

but i want the world where my daddy is

and don't know why

anybody's God would make me

have to choose.

"bubble-gum cigarettes"

this is exactly how i felt when i realized that my grandfather and i could never be sealed together as the lds church believes is the way for families to stay together in heaven.  i couldn't believe god could be so heartless in dividing up families when we have no choice in who we are sent to and then develop love for each other only to be split up in heaven based on faith.

and since jill was technically my grandpa's favorite all of the poems woodson shared about her grandpa reminded me of my sister and my grandpa.  

the other poems i enjoyed were:

"south carolina at war" in which her grandfather explained to woodson and her siblings why the protesting was going on in the south.  it closes with 

Because you're colored, my grandfather says.

And just as good and bright and beautiful and free as anybody.

and nobody colored in the South is stopping,

my grandfather says,

until everybody knows what's true.

"ghosts" which shared how "whites only" signs were painted over in greenvills except for the bathrooms when a lot of paint wasn't used so the words were "like a ghost standing in front still keeping you out."

"lessons" about how woodson's mom never learned to cook because instead of learning, she wanted to play outside like the boys.  mama realized it wasn't fair that the boys played while the girls were inside, a step forward for feminism though a step back for mom (because know she doesn't know how to cook.)

"stevie and me" in which at the library, woodson discovered stevie which featured characters that looked like her.  she shared:

I'd never believed 

that someone who looked like me

could be in the pages of the book

that someone who looked like me

had a story.

"learning from langston" in which woodson demonstrated how she mimicked hughes' poems to learn how to write.

"music" which shared how woodson's mom didn't let them listen to songs that had the word funk, so they listened to white radio stations.

how too listen #8 

do you remember . . .?

someone's always asking

and someone else, always does.

"the revolution" which likens the revolution to a merry-go-round.

"every wish, one dream" in which woodson wishes on everything to be a writer. (which we all know comes true!)

reading this book was a wonderful experience and i learned so much from it, i can only imagine what young adults will gain.  i highly recommend this book and hope you enjoy it as i much as i did.

flora & ulysses. kate dicamillo. k.g. campbell. (170)

i follow the new york public library (@nypl) on instagram and they posted the winner of the newbery medal award for 2014:

so of course, i immediately went and requested the flora & ulysses! i was also shocked to discover that delano actually had it and i didn't have to wait for it to come.

i was very excited about the book on cover and page flipping.  first, it is about a girl and a squirrel! adorable!  second, it is written by kate dicamillo who also wrote newbery medal winner the tale of despereaux, which i haven't read but have a copy to read.  and third, it is part graphic novel!  i thought this was clever because kids the graphic novel part would attract kids but majority of the book is real text.

my excitement was soon met with disappointment.  though an interesting premise, i didn't completely enjoy the story myself so it did not seem newbery medal worthy, but i can see why it would appeal to kids.

flora & ulysses is the story of a girl flora and ulysses, a squirrel has super powers after he is sucked up by a vacuum, ulysses 2000x (yes, he is named after the vacuum.) his superpowers are super strength, ability to understand humans and communicate with humans via typing, flying, and writing poetry.  i really loved the idea of him writing poetry.  he is revived after his accident by flora, a self described cynic.  she is an avid reader of a comic book and that is how she discovered ulysses is a superhero.  the books is their adventure as they discover what ulysses can do.  oh and i should add that ulysses, arch-nemesis is flora's mother.  she wanted ulysses dead for fear that he had rabies.

the characters in the story are great.  i loved that flora was a cynic and gained so much knowledge from a column in the back of the comic book called terrible things can happen to you.  it would make a great companion book to this novel.  she was a very clever child.  ulysses is a poetry-writing squirrel, need i say more? just read his poem:

words for flora

nothing

would be easier without 

you,

because you 

are 

everything,

all of it--

sprinkles, quarks, giant donuts, eggs sunny-side up--

you

are the ever-expanding

universe 

to me.

(seriously the sweetest poem! i would actually take a book of his poetry as a companion to this novel as well.)

my favorite character had to be dr. meerscham, flora's father's neighbor, she was eccentric but filled with truth.  i loved the mystic way she shared stories, for example,

all things are possible. when i was a girl in blundermeecen, the miraculous happened every day. or every other day. or every third day. actually, sometimes it did not happen at all, even on the third day. but still, we expected it. you see what i'm saying? even when it didn't happen, we were expecting it. we knew the miraculous would come.

i loved that she had a painting of a giant squid attacking a boat to remind her that "loneliness makes us do terrible things".  but the best that came from her and what i will steal from her to used is what she used instead of good-bye growing up in blundermeecen, "i promise to always turn back towards you."  so sweet.

i know that my praise of characters seems to contradiction my lack of praise for the book, but even with these wonderful characters the book lacked an interesting storyline and plot.  i became bored with the book, the incident at the restaurant was ho-hum and i think that was meant to be the first amazing adventure.  even the climax when flora's mother squirrel-napping ulysses wasn't all that nail bitting or exciting.  dicamillo had a great cast but just did not know how to direct them.  the episodes of each chapter were good but didn't make for a great book.  

i have to add this book was great in terms of vocabulary.  there were words that i had to look up!  if a kid takes the time to look up words they come across in this book, it could build their vocabulary.

it was a good read but not a great one, but still check it out.  it did win the newbery medal, so maybe i am the one that is off versus vice versa.

i 

the house on mango street. sandra cisneros.

the kern county library has a program called one book in which i am assuming the community reads one book and there are a bunch of related events. in celebration of national hispanic month, sandra cisneros' "the house on mango street" was chosen as the one book for september-november. and even more exciting cisneros is giving a talk for the program! when i found out about the talk i decided to reread "the house on mango street" in preparation if i attend the talk.

i think i read "the house on mango street" in high school. it was assigned and i actually read it. (it is short). but i bought a copy after i read in then. i actually read my own og one versus checking it out, though i did notice that the library had new copies due to the one book program. (random: i recently came across another copy with a different cover at a $1 bookstore and purchased that one because i sadly do judge books by their covers.)

i remember loving this book in high school. the part that stuck with me all these years is when the discussion of her name "esperanza". i loved the metaphor of her name as silver chewing gum wrapper because its hard to pronounce. the actual line goes:

"at school they say my name funny as if the syllables were made out of tin and hurt the roof of your mouth."

i remember being so impressed with her imagery. i have difficulty pronouncing spanish names and words and it does feel like chewing tin. since i have a name that is always mispronounced, this part left such an impression on me.

this line also exemplifies what i love about cisneros, her poetic flair. cisneros really is a poet. each chapter reads like a poem instead of a short story. her book is filled with clever and beautiful imagery:

"our laughter for example. not the shy ice cream bells' giggle of rachel and lucy's family, but all of a sudden and surprised like a stack of dishes breaking."

"in english my name means hope. in spanish it means too many letters. it means sadness, it means waiting. it is like the number nine. a muddy color. it is the mexican records my father plays on sunday mornings when he is shaving, songs like sobbing

"you can fall asleep and wake up drunk on sky, and sky can keep you safe when you are sad."

her words really are lovely.

i also connected with this work, culturally. thanks to grandma bea i am 1/8 mexican but a very americanized one. a coconut. however thanks to growing up in delano, i am mexican culturally. people are always shocked that i can cumbia, know about the cucuy and eat elote. growing up in delano, you are inevitably mexican. and though i didn't grow up in the slums of delano, i understood how esperanza felt growing up. the insecurity of not having the right shoes at a family party, understanding the power of rubbing a egg when you have a fever and feeling safe in the dingy part of town. and though there were some things i do not know first hand, i can empathize because i know someone who has. (well maybe not the sexual abuse part.)

the part that had a bigger impact on me now than in high school was the chapter "papa who wakes up tired in the dark". the reason for the change is that my grandpa jimmy passed away in the time between my two readings. in this chapter, her papa told her that her grandfather passed away and she saw for the first time her father vulnerable and sad. this reminded me of how at my grandpa's funeral i was struck by the thought that though this was difficult for me, i could not imagine how my mom and aunts and uncles felt because that was their dad. and that it is sad to lose a grandparent, losing a father is greater lost. cisneros described it as:

"and i think if my own papa died what would i do. i think if my own papa died what would i do."

and i guess this is what i loved, is that she captured life. there is an openness and honesty in her work. it felt very autobiographical (all fiction is in some way or another). but she wrote about life and how it is not alway ideal but the human spirit perseveres.

(if you are in delano or bakersfield, pick up a copy. it's a short read. and check out her talk this thursday, 11.8.12 at csub.)

howl and other poems. allen ginsberg. (61)

the library of congress recently released a list of 88 books that shaped america. and "howl" was one listed on it and thus i was inspired to check it out.

after reading "on the road", i decided i would have been a beat in a previous life. though i would have to be a male in that previous life cos there really wasn't a place for women among the beats, they were either sex objects or beards, plus i wouldn't want to miss out on all of the gay sex that happen between the beats. the nomadic-ness, the drugs, the rejection of post ww II conservatism and social standards, sounds glamourous but there was a dark and dirty side too but was worth the suffering.

before i start, i am not one for poetry so did not have too deep of thoughts about this so this post is not an analytical one. i loved the imagery and realized that i need to study the beats more. i will admit i did consult wikipedia for a thorough reading because i did not get any of the references. and if you read it, i suggest you do too. (ps if you want to read it, www.poets.org has it listed.)

part 1 is a look at chaos that is the beats generation, a praise of the "angelheaded hipsters" that lived as they wanted regardless of the consequences suffered. it was dirty and dangerous but also exhilarating.

the poem reads as what i what i could imagine (or would have loved) my twenties would have been if i did more drugs. it is filled with random incidents of jazzing, sexing, wandering, protesting, questioning, experimenting and living.

my favorite incident/story from the poem was:

"who were expelled from the academies for crazy & publishing obscene odes on the windows of the skull"

which wikipedia explained to me as:

"Part of the reason Ginsberg was suspended in his sophomore year from Columbia University was because he wrote obscenities in his dirty dorm window. He suspected the cleaning woman of being an anti-Semite because she never cleaned his window, and he expressed this feeling in explicit terms on his window, by writing "Fuck the Jews", and drawing a swastika. He also wrote a phrase on the window implying that the president of the university had no testicles."

i love that story because it captured the great spirit of ginsberg.

part 2, i can admit was over my head.

part 3 is about being institutionalized which sadly was the fate of many of the free-thinkers of the time. it's sad that your unconventionality or deviant sexual behavior could resulted in shock treatment. its also horrible to think how we treat and marginalized outsiders.

all in all, it did shape america and for someone not born of the generation also romanticized it. though i am unsure i have thick enough skin to be a beat.

other poems were also included with "howl". there was a great one about walt whitman being in a california supermarket. my favorite image was "wives in the avocados! babies in the tomatoes".

there was also one about greyhound. being a frequent rider of the greyhound this was a treat and a very accurate description of the greyhound. my favorite line was "an aluminum box of human blood for Stockton" because i have actually seen human blood be delivered via the greyhound. i was at the greyhound in bakersfield, when i saw a brown box labeled "human blood" be picked up by a houchin blood bank employee.

lastly i have to share my favorite quote which is from william carlos williams' introduction:

"hold back the edges of your gowns, ladies, we are going through hell."